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Middlesbrough disko refugees the Space Raiders
have a reputation for being a bit mad, a bit wacky, the antithesis
of chin-stroking techno. If we were a band, which secretly we are,
we would be like them. But better, of course. Skint debut Don’t
Be Daft was proof that Poundland is the most reasonable instrument
shop in town, and their fondness for sound toys and cheap gadgets
shows them to be men after our own hearts (but don’t tell the wife!).
We bribed our way into their dressing room with a bag full of toys
and set about them with a Sky Dancers sound-effect storybook. They
may have the image of a trio of dancing fools, but even they thought
we were weird.
Is Little Stevie Wonder (another fashionable
sound/book thing) going to make it into a tune?
Raider Mark (all mouth and
no hair): Yeah, we made a little symphony out of it.
We notice it’s not on the album.
No, because I only bought it after
the album was finished, but the next album... who knows? There’s
plenty of toys on the first album – the gun that we shoot with,
that’s on there. The light sabre’s on a track.
You were wandering around with
them on stage, but they don’t appear to be amplified.
Well it doesn’t matter, it flashes
doesn’t it? It looks like a gun and it flashes. I’m not making a
noise.
We noticed from the live thing that
one of you appears to be pressing a few buttons, and the other two
are arsing around – does that happen when you’re recording as well?
No, not when we’re recording, but
when we bring it live we could bring all the computers out, we could
stand around like we did last time and look like... a tweak here,
a tweak there. It’s like how boring is that? So when we play it
live we’ve got a set of CD decks where the track’s stripped down
to just basslines, drumlines, and the melodies.
(Spectacularly pissed Raider): Gary’s playing live
keyboards and I arse around to be honest. I’ve got drum pads I can
use, or I like shout when I like, dance about with the guns. But
yeah, we could do the other, we could bring all the keyboards out,
we could sit there twiddling knobs and doing all the noises live
but how boring is that? We’d rather be Funkadelic than Orbital.
You seem more like The Goodies
to me.
Raider Marty (decks &
fx, not Wilkinson Sword’s best customer): The Goodies is
good as well. Were The Goodies the British Funkadelic? Discuss...
We were promised presents weren’t we?
You see, we wanted to get you
some more sound toys, but Poundland are out of them, so we got you
a magic rod. Have you ever seen a magic rod before? Can we have
the light off, please?
Mark: Can you put the light
off?
We start waving the rods around in
the darkness, showing off the exciting range of LED messages.
Woah! Is that for us?
Marty: That is good. That’s beautiful.
And it says something in Chinese
too, so it’s educational.
Mark: Ah, now I’m bound to
get the ladies.
That’s what we said. It didn’t
work though, did it? So anyway, we noticed your light show was very
disappointing.
Mark: No, it’s normally really
good, but there’s no screen back there. The visuals are done by
an old mate of ours from Middlesbrough. There’s a scaffolding tower
that we could’ve brought. We did Preston and there was a really
big screen and they are good visuals, but here it’s really
cramped. You’ve got to defend your mates haven’t you, but he does
top visuals.
Go on, ask them why they moved to Brighton/No,
I’ve asked them that/I haven’t, so you ask it again/No, you ask
it...
Mark: We moved to Brighton
because every time we had to go and have a conversation there (with
Skint) it was just too mad, every time we had to come anywhere.
Gary was doing most of the driving.
Why go to Skint? Why not another
label?
It was absolutely necessary that
we sent a tape to Skint. They’re the only label we thought of.
Marty: Gary had witches tell him that we should go to Skint.
Mark: Yeah – north Yorkshire witches.
Have you adapted the set as you’ve been
on tour?
Marty: It’s got madder. We
don’t have any kind of idea really, before we go on. We don’t have
a set list, and we do what we think.
Mark: Tonight was OK, it was a mad set but it’s all working
out. It’s chaos onstage, it really is. We’re jamming on the stage
which is, well, creative if nothing else. It’s fucking chaos but
we’re having a laugh and we’re getting into it.
Gary: We don’t know what we’re gonna do, do we Martin?
Marty: I don’t know what you’re gonna do. You fell over tonight.
Gary: I know, I fell right over. I fell over the monitor,
tripped over the monitor backwards. For about two minutes I was
trying to get up. Is that magic rod ours?
We wanted to give them to you
earlier but we wanted to do the interview later, so we could drink
a lot.
Mark: They’d be great for
Valentine’s night.
Make sure you wave it at a lady,
preferably, you know. Or a gentleman, if you’re that way inclined.
Just don’t wave it at hard blokes.
Marty: Thanks for the toys.
Mark: Well I think we’ve all had enough. More questions,
or else I’m off to dance.
Can you boogie?
Can we boogie? Martin, can
we boogie? Yes sir, we can boogie!
Congratulations!! You’re the first
person to answer that question correctly. Which is better – daddy
or chips?
What? Daddy or chips??
It’s off the advert.
Daddy or chips...daddy or chips.
Chips!
Marty: I haven’t seen it, but chips.
Gary: Chips. If you ain’t got no chips, you ain’t got nothing.
(Gary almost decapitates himself trying to read the messages
on his magic rod)
Mark: More questions, before Gary
gets violent.
What’s your favourite toy?
My light sabre.
Have you seen the ones that shoot
out when you press a button?
The telescopic ones? We’ve
only got the little one. I don’t know what that’s saying about the
size of my penis.
Marty: My megaphone’s my favourite toy.
Mark: Martin’s megaphone is his favourite toy, and mine’s
my tiny penis. And Gary’s is his magic wand. Next question – come
on, we’re sat here wasting valuable dancing time.
You’ve got ‘Access All Areas’ badges
– which areas have you accessed that you wouldn’t normally go to?
Marty: Dressing room, dancing
snake pit, and the ladies toilets.
Haven’t you tried going to the
zoo with them or anything? Any excuse to get out.
So is Skint one big happy family
then?
Mark: Very much, we go
out with Phil Lo-Fi during the week. The best nights are during
the week for us lot – we go out to like little indie dance clubs.
Some top nights in Brighton. Everyone gets on, really.
Speaking of the Lo-Fi’s – has
"Dave" (Wrekked Train) been ostracised?
No, he hasn’t been ostracised,
he wants to do other stuff, he’s not so much into dance music. He
wants to concentrate more on his paintings as well; he’s quite a
good painter. There’s no like bad shit or anything, they’re just
kinda getting on – making some nice stuff as well. Next! We can’t
be talking about other bands.
Have you got a record coming out that
you want to advertise? Are you treated like minor stars?
Not at all, nobody knows us. Next
question.
Favourite frequency?
Long wave! World Service cricket,
off to sleep. England are getting beat again. What are you gonna
do? What can you do? Wake up with the marvellous Radio 4
and it’s all better again. Live monkey football – that’s the sport
of the future!
Who’s singing on Laidback?
Me.
Why? Can you sing? Are you a good
singer?
When I’m drunk I’ll tell you I can
sing. Where were you when we sang that track live now? Fucking hell,
come on! I want 20 minutes dance before I get on this bus.
How have you been keeping yourselves
amused on tour?
Marty: Playstation, charity
shopping, Little Stevie Wonder.
How many charities have you shopped?
Mark: We’ve shopped loads
of charities. "Oxfam, you’re just not doing it right, I’m
calling somebody now." Putting a collar on and charge twice
the price – how’s that charity, eh? You don’t scare me one little
bit.
If you were booked to play a wedding
what would be your top five tunes to cover? Bearing in mind you’ve
got to get the bride "lifting it up" a bit.
Always. Girlfriend in a Coma
by the Smiths. Wedding songs, I don’t know, I’ve never been married.
One more question and I’m off, I’ve had enough.
Can we remix you?
Marty: That’s a good one.
We’re second rate DJs. Freddy
Fresh told us to put out a record, and we’d like to put one of yours
out.
Mark: Was that the last question?
Yeah, that’ll do. We could ask
you what record you’d like to sample.
If I could say anyone, without all
the legal stuff? Good Vibrations by the Beach Boys.
Were you a crusty techno band before?
Martin was in a techno band, Gary’s
never been into techno really, Gary’s always been a house boy. Before
that he was kinda like indie, Spiritualized, Spacemen 3.
Marty: I like a bit of techno, I like all the Warp stuff.
Mark: I’ve got nothing against techno — techno’s nice
and stripped down. Four to the floor’s good as well, if you’re on
drugs. Me, I like music with a bit of hips, and it doesn’t have
any hips, it’s like exercise to me. But there’s good stuff as well.
Do you want to come for a dance?
So we all wander off to have a dance to
the last throes of Danielsan’s DJ set, all except for Gary, who
can barely stand up by this time. Now normally this would be seen
as a good time to call it a night, but we’ve made friends with Martin
by now, so we may as well try to confuse him a bit before we depart.
What’s Danielsan’s real name? Is it
Daniel San?
Marty: it’s Danny Curtis.
Well, that’s not funny any more,
is it?
"Wax on, wax off."
What’s the point of that?/Well
you can’t put it on and on – it’s on/But if you put it on, then
off, what’s the point in putting it on in the first place?
You can do whatever you choose in
life, can’t you? You’ve got to make it happen, as Liam said.
We’re big fans of your publicity photos
– did you have to break into a school on the last day of term?
We actually went to a proper family
portrait photographer. We didn’t even think of that one, it was
all Skint’s idea. (the poor fella’s having trouble now) The
brain... you’ve caught us on a mad night because we did London last
night and we all got a bit mashed, there were loads of press there.
And today it’s like that’s finished – let’s have a good party again
– and let’s face it: London, it’s wicked cos it’s London, but
the press...
Is it scary getting loads of press?
Well, it’s as scary as you want
to make it.
Do we scare you, interviewing
you? What if we lean in a bit further?
You lot have got silly toys, and
that’s well up in our book. And you’ve given us presents, so you
lot are well up there. You lot will be working for all kinds of
companies one day. (We already are – fanzines don’t pay the mortgage,
you know). You’re the ones that’ll be at the cream of the crop
if you stick at it.
Well we just do what we like,
and if anyone else likes it that’s a bonus.
Yeah, but that’s the attitude to
take isn’t it, at the end of the day.
But no one comes to Norwich, so
you have to move away for anything to happen. One day there might
be a revolution.
And who goes to Middlesbrough? But
we sent a tape out and we got ourselves signed up, didn’t we?
How does Skint manage to pay your
wages – are you living off the Fatboy millions?
Of course we are. He’s our meal
ticket, as it’s been said on the tour. It’s great.
Am I boring you?
Are we boring you?
No.
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